Beautifully Imperfect.
You know voluptuouschic, i’m gonna make you my best friend again. I always feel better after writing down my thoughts for the days or weeks. Somehow i feel pathetic that i’m talking to myself at the same time.
I had this thought running on my mind just a minute ago, is my presence being taken for granted?
For the record, i know nuts about my boyfriend’s past relationships, the first guy i’ve never asked about anything. They say that sometimes it’s better not to know, but hey, you know sometimes us women are curious cats, it’s just impossible to not wanna know anything. Which led me to think, was he too hurt in his previous relationships to cause such a wall he’s building up or is he really just that?
In some cases, men tend to be hurt from past relationships and thus a protective barrier being portrayed to prevent themselves from getting the same hurt. And because of this, they are not willing to risk being nice and letting down their guard. They will get into the next relationship but with caution, thinking, ” Alien from Venus detected, beware of your actions and how much feelings to put in, too much affection added is toxic.” Of course, this is solely my point of view which i believe most will agree. 
Sad to say, the above protective barrier also applies to us women. Furthermore, it wears out as soon as you are comfortable with the person you’re with, after much wear and tear. My point is of course, how do we break through to get to know him better, if he’s just too tough a nut to crack?
Somehow, i resigned my fate to this boyfriend’s character, there’s nothing more i can expect out of him. That’s all, what you see is what you get. Suddenly, i reminded myself with this quote that i abide, loving that beautifully imperfect person perfectly. Now that i brought this up, i’m laughing at myself, why did i make myself so miserable the past few weeks? When i could actually put all these small lil imperfections i’m not satisfied with, put them together and love this beautifully imperfect man that’s perfect for me?
This tough nut, doesn’t express his love to me openly, doesn’t love me the way man love their woman, doesn’t buy me gifts, doesn’t lovey dovey with me, doesn’t spend quality time with me (note: men and women have different views on the term “spending time”). For all i know, he loves me in his heart, only he knows it and with exception that once in a blue moon, he lets me know. This, is my boyfriend, the one that i can still love despite the odds.
